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Dear Diary



Kae H. Anders



ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS


Love is unconditional,

Oppression is purely criminal.


Kae H. Anders


I wish to express sincere gratitude to various people I have encountered in my journey through life, and their positive influences they have had on me. First, I wish to thank my father, mother, and brother for encouraging me to follow my dreams and push forward through all of life’s challenges, as this has never been an easy feat. Second, I wish to thank my husband and son, Brian and Benjamin, and all of my future descendants, for giving me courage to pursue extraordinary heights and for being the lights of my life. Third, I wish to thank Mrs. Jeffords for advocating for America’s youth, being one of the first people to help me reach my full potential and continuing to believe in me. Fourth, I wish to thank all friends who have stood by me throughout the years. Fifth, I wish to thank the faculty and staff from the University of West Florida for giving me the tools I needed to finish my degree. I also wish to express gratitude and safety to my brothers and sisters in uniform, especially those who stood by me when I needed them most. Risking life on a daily basis is something that only a special few have the courage to do- the 1% who are in the armed forces.


I wish to express gratitude to all of my readers, and do hope that all of you can benefit from reading about my transition through life. Sunset of Hope for a New Dawn is my first literary work, which contains various poems about my life experiences from 2006-2016. Life is beautiful, and I encourage all to embrace it wholly.

CONTENTS

My Writing

The Day I Will Never Forget

They Live to Bully

Anxiety

Dreams

Empty

Runner’s High

Heels

Religion

Indescribable

Stop Lights

To This Day

Inspiration

Siren of the Specter

Drill Crush

Traveling

Heart of Words

Girl with Eyes of Fire

Rising Up

Fleeting

Hot Sake

To You (Thank You)

Ancestors

The Township

One Heart

Ben



My Writing

My writing is derived by emotion

Happy, sad, mellow,

Sometimes outright hatred, confusion, or devotion,

A lot of times about a dimwitted fellow.


I will try my best to uplift,

To take care that I look out for others,

It is not my intention to be published

As my writing has always been my covert appeasement.


Through all my papers I sift,

And come across all my life's turns,

All of my writing has been kept unpublished,

For the sake of preventing more personal mistreatment.


In all of my daily chaos

I love to write

Whether poetry common or heinous, or coming back from a hiatus,

It makes me free to feel delight.


The world of writing is my home

It causes my mind to forever free-roam,

In a land where there is a peaceful tone

Whether my presence is known, or quietly unknown.





The Day I Will Never Forget

-Previously published in Images magazine, Evans, GA,

2006-2007, in memory of 9/11/2001.


This day was very tragic,

Not even patriotic.

There is nothing as depressing,

Nothing as saddening,

As this terrible day,

When evil won,

And tears blocked the sun.


There were lives shed,

Hundreds and thousands to be dead.

This day is very sad,

The millions of tears,

Lives lasting many years.

All lost

All at a terrible cost.


It is very hard to say,

That this may not be the

Last attack they dismay.



They Live to Bully

Every laugh,

Every remark,

Takes me down to half,

Causes me to hide in the dark, secretly leaving a mark.


If they gave me a chance,

I could be their friend,

Instead they give one glance,

And laugh out loud, making me bend.


I think they have the best smiles,

I think they have the best hair,

I think they have the best clothes,

I think they have the best bond.


I wish I could laugh with them a while,

I wish I could share their flare,

I wish I could join them and shoot goals,

I wish I could correspond.


Maybe someday they will see me as a person,

Hopefully before these thoughts worsen.

If I make it to twenty,

I hope I won’t feel this empty.



Anxiety


Am I simply too shy?

Do I simply choose to defy?

On what information can I rely?

Where is a corner to cry?

What if they don’t like me?

Are there too many apologies?

Is it too late to be absentee?

Oh God-he looked at me?

Would it be awkward to hide?

When will this nervousness subside?

What if I just lied?

Would the story be well-designed?

Do I really have to try?

Do they honestly think I qualify?

Is it time yet to verify?

What will happen if I have an outcry?


Someday, I will conquer the nervousness,

The blushing will mean my assertiveness,

I will not worry every correction means worthlessness,

I will not worry my life is purposeless.



Dreams

Seeing your dreams

Active on a screen

Would amaze me

Allow me to see

Your feelings of love

Your opinion on heaven above

Your musical illusions

Your amusing, creative solutions

I could get to know you

Your truest intentions, it would give me a clue

Because you are so mysterious,

I could become anew, never adieu.

Your presence is like magic

Your smile, so fantastic,

My feelings for you, forever a pageant,

Feeling you be an automatic, a romantic, a classic, my favorite fashion.

My dreams are the privilege of being your girl

If you enjoy a head of curl

Someone as rare as a pearl

Forever, I could take you anywhere in the world.

If you were to give me a whirl,

We could forever concur,

I would forever rest, no protest,

In your dreams, if I could be your guest.




Empty

-to a pedophile


The man I grew to love,

The man I grew to appreciate,

The man I thought the world of,

The man that made me lightweight,

The man I have been in mourning of...

is The man you chose to fabricate.


With long-lost life to never recover

I can no longer

Choose to surrender


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